Life in the U.S. strategies and guides are essential knowledge for every U.S. immigrant, as they help you understand the country in a shorter time and adapt to American life sooner. The following guide is closely related to daily life: restaurants.
Please wait to be seated
When dining at non-fast-food restaurants in the U.S., you are generally led to your table by a host or hostess. Such restaurants usually have a service desk at the entrance, or a sign that says "Please wait to be seated." If there is such a desk or sign, do not walk in directly; wait at the entrance for a moment. Even if you are meeting friends who are already seated, you should generally wait for the host to locate their table and lead you to the dining area. Before seating you, the host will ask "How many?" Sometimes they may also ask if you prefer a smoking or non-smoking section. Since more and more public places in the U.S. are now smoke-free, you will encounter this question much less frequently. If you have any special seating requests, such as wanting a window seat or a quieter area, you can mention them so the host can find the most satisfactory spot for you. If you happen to be led to a seat you do not like, you can mention it, but do not change seats on your own. American restaurants arrange seating this way because each server is responsible for a specific section. The host balances the number of guests assigned to each server to ensure that some areas are not overwhelmed while others are idle.
After you are seated, the server responsible for your table will bring the menus. In China, it is common for a large group to share one or two menus, but in American restaurants, everyone orders their own meal, so it is understandable that each person receives their own menu. Before ordering, the server will ask if you would like any drinks. If you have not decided yet, you can say something like, "I'm not sure yet. Give me a couple of minutes." The free beverage in American restaurants is ice water; if you cannot decide what to order but want something to drink, you can just ask for "water." After the server brings your drinks, they will leave to give you time to look at the menu and choose your meal. Some restaurants have daily specials, which the server will introduce before you order.
Ordering
American menus rarely have pictures, but the ingredients and preparation methods for each dish are clearly written. Many people in the U.S. have food allergies, so listing ingredients clearly makes it easier for guests to choose. If you have decided what to order, closing your menu indicates that you are "ready to order." The first few times I dined in an American restaurant, I would read the menu to pass the time while waiting for the server, but the server never came. I wondered why the service was so poor. Later, I observed that in the U.S., you must close your menu to signal that you are ready to order. If the server has not come after you have decided, do not try to call them over. The custom in the U.S. is to wait for the server to approach you and ask if you are ready. Waving your arms and calling out "Hey, waiter/waitress" is considered very impolite. Generally, the server will quickly notice if a guest's menu is closed. If the wait is truly long, you should wait until you make eye contact, then give a slight nod or smile to indicate you are ready.
Occasionally, a server may ask if you are ready before you close your menu; this might be because the restaurant is not busy or the server happens to be free. If you are not ready, politely say, "I need a couple more minutes." If you have questions about a dish, you can also ask the server at this time.
When ordering, try to be concise. In China, people often order while looking at the menu. In the U.S., this is considered a waste of the server's time and delays service for other tables.
Ordering in American restaurants is an art. When I first arrived, I was most afraid of ordering. In China, ordering is just stating the name of the dish. Unlike in China, many choices in the U.S. are not on the menu. First, Western food has different side dishes that can be chosen according to your taste. Second, the U.S. places great emphasis on individual choice, which is reflected even in small matters like ordering. For example, when ordering breakfast in the U.S., if you order eggs and bacon, the server will ask, "How do you like your eggs cooked?" The first time I heard this question, I had no idea how to answer, and I was lucky to have a friend with me to help. There are many ways to cook eggs: over-easy, over-hard, sunny-side-up, and scrambled. After the eggs, there is bread: "Do you want your bread toasted or not toasted? What kind of bread do you like? Whole wheat or white?" If you don't want bread, would you like a British muffin? With so many choices, the server knows them by heart, but for us foreigners who are unfamiliar with them, it feels like an oral exam.
Salad dressing: You can usually order a salad as an appetizer. Generally speaking, garden salad, green salad, and dinner salad do not come with dressing. The server will ask, "What dressing do you like?" The most common choices are: ranch, caesar, blue cheese, Italian, and thousand island. Other specialty salads will have their dressings listed on the menu.
In the U.S., dishes are not brought out as soon as they are ready; in most cases, all the dishes ordered by a table are served together. During the meal, the server will usually come by at least once to ask if the food is to your liking ("How do you like it?") and if you need more drinks. Of course, unless the food is truly terrible, people usually say, "I like it. Very good. Perfect." Some people feel this is hypocritical, as the server does not actually care if you are satisfied and just wants to leave a good impression to earn a better tip. There is some truth to this. However, I believe that beyond the tip, the American service industry generally follows a philosophy of building friendly relationships with strangers. You often see servers chatting and joking with guests, especially with familiar repeat customers.
When dining in the U.S., you rarely see leftovers on the table. People order according to their appetite and do not order extra just to show off. When I first came to the U.S., I had a small appetite, and American portions are large, so I would always have at least half left over. Actually, it is fine to have leftovers. When the server sees that the guests are almost finished, they will ask if you would like dessert. If you are ready to pay, the server will ask if you would like a box to take the food home. If you are ready to pay the bill, an attentive server will ask if the bill is together or separate. Many people in the U.S. go Dutch, so servers are very accustomed to splitting the bill. You can even tell the server to pay only for what you ordered. If everyone orders something different, the bill will be different. Regarding payment, do not fight over the bill like people do in China. Although this is a sign of hospitality and generosity, in the U.S., when dining with friends, unless agreed upon beforehand, it is usually split evenly. If you want to treat someone, it is best to get your American friend's consent beforehand; do not shout about it at the table. Americans have a strong sense of independence and equality. While treating others is our way of showing hospitality, one must also "do as the Romans do."
Tips of tipping
The bill will be brought in a folder or on a small tray (with the bill face down). This provides some privacy for the person paying. Dining in American restaurants, tipping is an immutable rule. The fixed income of American food service staff is not high, and most of their income comes from tips. For people from countries where tipping is not practiced, how much to tip is always a confusing question, but even if you ask Americans, there may not be a unified answer.