Pay attention to U.S. investment immigration and U.S. education: Before allowing your child to enter the deep waters, you must teach them how to swim. This is a basic principle understood by every responsible parent. Parents are familiar with water and understand the balance between its advantages and dangers, which can mean the difference between life and death. However, many parents are not familiar with the United States, which can feel like an ocean—full of charm and immensely tempting, but also fraught with risks. Therefore, I would like to remind parents that before sending their children to study alone in the United States (or other countries), it is essential to make the most basic and important preparations—teaching them how to navigate the ocean of studying abroad. To ensure that children can thrive safely in this environment, several fundamental abilities must be cultivated; otherwise, allowing them to study abroad blindly may not be a wise decision.
The Statue of Liberty in the United States is a symbol of this country—freedom. Freedom means that there is ample space for your actions and very few restrictions. In such an environment, at the very least, children need to possess the following abilities:
1 The ability to distinguish right from wrong—this is particularly important. After living in the United States for twenty-four years, I have the impression that both the best and the worst of the world exist here, and what is comforting is that you can make your own choices—opportunities are relatively equal for everyone (I have experienced this firsthand in the context of my three daughters’ college admissions). It's like different people entering a restaurant with everything available, facing dazzling choices, each with their own preferences. Some choose based on taste, some based on nutrition, others on visual appeal; some even mix and match, leading to varied outcomes for everyone who consumes the meals. Regardless of private or public schools—or even prestigious universities—incidents involving smoking, drinking, drug use, sexual activity, and even gun violence are not uncommon. How can we prevent these unfortunate events? This requires groundwork to be done before children travel abroad. After leaving, maintaining a clear line of communication with them is paramount. Treat your child like a kite; gradually release the string as they mature, and when the time is right, let them fly freely.
2 The ability to handle stress—this must not be overlooked. Facing unfamiliar surroundings and adapting to various aspects of life, study, and social interactions can cause many changes in a child’s psychological state. Different children will naturally have different ways of handling pressure depending on their personalities. As parents, it is crucial to be aware of these differences and not overlook them, as this could lead to grave mistakes that might result in regret. Timely understanding of a child's thoughts and emotional states is vital. Offering guidance and support when they face challenges is important, and even criticism should be approached with care. Thoughtless, self-assured approaches often backfire. Otherwise, over time, children might stop sharing their struggles with parents, leading to catastrophic results, especially when they have no one else to confide in. There are many lessons to learn in this area; tragic incidents often arise even among children who have grown up in the United States due to parental negligence. I am someone who finds bookstores more interesting than clothing stores. Before my eldest daughter went to college, I saw many books in bookstores like 'How to Survive College.' I thought they were exaggerated—after all, I survived in the countryside, and college should be amazing; how could there be talk of survival? I assumed it was foolish to write such books, who would buy them? I dismissed their contents. Until my eldest daughter faced issues with friendships, involvement in clubs, extracurricular activities, elective courses, and balancing academic and social life, and I reflected on those 'foolish' books. After reading them, I realized that I was the one who had been presumptuous. It is easy to imagine the troubles and challenges awaiting a high school student traveling alone across the ocean. If parents can effectively assist them (note: not take over), their ability and confidence in overcoming difficulties will greatly increase, significantly benefiting their growth.
3 Self-control (especially for girls)—this is of critical importance. In the economically developed United States, the commercial atmosphere is intense, and the allure is considerable; it can be a test even for adults. Homeless children are particularly vulnerable as they face no constraints. Similarly, when children (especially younger ones) arrive in the United States alone, if they do not receive sufficient care and attention, it is not surprising that they might slip into temptation. The phenomena of smoking, drinking, drug use, and sexual activity in schools, as previously mentioned, require children to have ample abilities to resist these temptations. When I drive to school to pick up my daughter, I have seen several pregnant high school students, initially mistaking them for young teachers. Due to religious and political factors in the United States, abortion remains a contentious issue, and there are many single mothers. The implications of this scenario can be significant. Before sending my daughter abroad, as a mother, it is imperative to impart these lessons—one misstep can lead to lifelong regret. Additionally, it is worth mentioning that children traveling in the United States should prioritize safety and avoid the temptation to hitch rides casually. When hitching a ride, it’s crucial to know the driving record of the person. Highways in the United States generally have speed limits of around seventy to eighty miles per hour, and each year, many students learn to drive and travel together, making accidents quite prevalent. In this regard, we have established rules for our children, and they are aware of the associated dangers.
The cultivation of fundamental abilities is crucial for children’s growth and future careers. Establishing a strong foundation in this area is a necessary condition for helping them become outstanding individuals in the future. Let’s go, comrades!
