Please wait to be seated
When dining at a non-fast-food restaurant in the United States, you are generally led to your seat by a host or hostess. Such restaurants usually have a service desk at the entrance, or a sign that says "Please wait to be seated." If there is such a service desk or sign, do not walk in directly; wait at the entrance for a moment. Even if you are meeting someone and your friend is already seated in the restaurant, you should generally have the server find your friend's table and lead you to the dining area. Before leading you to a seat, the server will ask "How many?" Sometimes they will also ask if you prefer a smoking or non-smoking area. Since more and more public places in the United States are now smoke-free, the chances of being asked this question have decreased significantly. If you have any special requirements for your seat, such as wanting to sit by a window or in a quieter area, you can mention it so the server can find the most satisfactory seat for you. In the unlikely event that you are led to a seat you do not want, you can also mention it; do not change seats on your own. The reason American restaurants make such arrangements is that each server is responsible for their own section. While meeting the needs of guests, the host or hostess also tries to balance the number of guests each server is responsible for, so that some areas are not too busy while others are too idle.
After the guests are seated, the server responsible for the table will bring the menu. In China, it is common for a large table of people to have only one or two menus, whereas in American restaurants, everyone orders their own portion, so it is not hard to understand why everyone gets their own menu. Before ordering, the server will first ask if you would like any drinks. If you have not decided, you can say something like "I'm not sure yet. Give me a couple of minutes." The free drink in American restaurants is ice water; if you cannot decide what to order but want something to drink, you can say "water." After the server brings the drinks you ordered, they will leave to give you some time to look at the menu and choose the dishes you want to eat. Some restaurants have daily specials, which the server will introduce to you before you order.
Ordering
United States menus rarely have pictures, but the ingredients and preparation methods for each dish are written very clearly. Many people in the United States have food allergies, so clearly stating the ingredients makes it easier for guests to choose. If you have decided what to order, closing the menu indicates that you are "ready to order." The first few times I ate at an American restaurant, I would read the menu to pass the time while waiting for the server, but the server never came. I wondered why the service was so poor. Later, after observing, I realized that in the United States, you must close the menu to indicate that you are ready to order. If the server has not come after you have decided what to order, do not try to call the server over. The custom in the United States is to wait for the server to take the initiative to ask if you are ready. Raising your arm and calling "Hey, waiter/waitress" is considered very impolite. Generally, the server will quickly notice whether the guest's menu has been closed. If the wait is indeed a bit long, you should generally wait until you make eye contact with them, then nod slightly or smile to indicate that you are ready.
Occasionally, the server will ask before you close the menu; this may be because the restaurant is not busy or the server just happens to be free. If you are not ready, politely say "I need a couple more minutes." If you have questions about a particular dish, you can also ask the server at this time.
When ordering, try to be concise. In China, people often order while looking at the menu. In the United States, people think this is a waste of the server's time and also delays the server's service to guests at other tables.
Ordering in an American restaurant is a skill. When I first arrived, the thing I feared most was ordering. In China, ordering just means saying the name of the dish. Unlike in China, when ordering in the United States, many choices are not on the menu. For one thing, American Western food has different side dishes that can be chosen according to your own taste. For another, the United States attaches great importance to individual choice, which is reflected even in the small matter of ordering food. For example, when ordering breakfast in the United States, if you order eggs and bacon, the server will ask, "How do you like your eggs cooked?" The first time I heard this question, I had no idea how to answer, and fortunately, a friend accompanying me helped. There are many ways to cook eggs; common ones include: fried on both sides but with a runny yolk (over-easy), fried on both sides with a hard yolk (over-hard), fried on one side (sunny-side-up), and scrambled. After talking about eggs, there is bread: "Do you want your bread baked or not baked? What kind of bread do you like? Whole wheat or white?" If you don't want bread, do you want a British muffin? With so many choices, it is already second nature to the server, but for us foreigners who don't understand, it feels like an oral exam.
Salad dressing: You can generally order a salad as an appetizer. Generally speaking, garden salad, green salad, and dinner salad do not come with salad dressing. The server will ask you, "What dressing do you like?" The most common choices are: ranch, caesar, blue cheese, Italian, and thousand Island. Other specialty salads will have the accompanying dressing listed on the menu.
In the United States, dishes are not brought out as soon as they are ready; in most cases, the dishes ordered by a table of people are brought out together. During the meal, the server will take the initiative to come over at least once to ask if the food is to your liking ("How do you like it?") and if you need more drinks. Of course, unless it is truly terrible, people usually say, "I like it. Very good. Perfect." Some people think this is hypocritical, as the server doesn't really care if you are satisfied, but just wants to leave a good impression to earn more tips. There is some truth to this. But I think that besides the tipping factor, the American service industry generally follows a service philosophy of building friendships with strangers. I often see servers chatting and joking with guests, especially when they see familiar repeat customers, they will definitely come over to chat for a while.
When eating in the United States, you rarely see leftovers on the table. People order according to their appetite and do not order extra just to show off. When I first came to the United States, I had a small appetite, and American restaurants serve large portions, so I would have at least half left over every time. In fact, it doesn't matter if there are leftovers. When the server sees that the guests have almost finished eating, they will ask if you want to order dessert. If you are ready to pay the bill, the server will also ask if you want to pack the leftovers. If you are ready to pay, an attentive server will ask if the bill is together or separate. Many people in the United States go Dutch when dining out, so servers are very used to splitting the bill into several parts. You can even tell the server to pay only for the portion you ordered. If everyone orders something different, the bill will be different. Regarding payment, do not scramble to pay like in China. Although this is a sign of hospitality and generosity, when dining out with friends in the United States, if it has not been agreed upon in advance, it is generally split equally. If you want to treat, it is better to get the consent of your American friends in advance; do not shout at the table. Americans have a strong sense of independence and equality. Although treating others to a meal is our way of being hospitable, one must also do as the Romans do.
Tips of tipping
The bill will be brought in a folder or on a small tray (the bill is placed face down). This is to give the person paying some privacy. Dining in an American restaurant, tipping is an immutable rule. The fixed income of American food service personnel is not high, and most of their income depends on tips. For people from countries where tipping is not practiced, how much to tip has always been a confusing question, but even if you ask an American, there may not be a unified answer.
